03.09.2021 “poisoned by castor”

I spend the last 6 hours or so reading about anarchism and political ideology. It makes me feel inadequately knowledgeable the more I read about political theory or really any theory in general. There is so much information out there I don't know where to start half the time. I crave understanding but for what purpose. There have been political uprisings non stop my whole life. There is always a political uprising somewhere in this world. There are people I am associated with who are no longer living that have devoted large parts of their lives to the work of making the world better. Be that teaching or documentation of social unrest. Challenging hegemony in oppressive systems. I remember so fondly the smile of Brad Will when they were much younger then I am now. They were a Xexoxial intern. They arrived after driving PLW from Naropa University to Dreamtime and ended up staying for the summer. I don't remember much from those times. I can picture Brad's glasses, they had broken and had been fixed by wrapping copper wire around the frames to hold everything together. I remember Brad taking off their glasses and letting me try them on. Many years later when I was just trying out being an adult I was in NYC and was at a rooftop film screening with Brad. I don't remember what the film was, I think it might have been at Rubulad. We were on the roof and Brad was telling me about their experiences traveling through South America. My cell phone rang (it must have been my first cell phone, I know it had buttons) and it was mIEKAL calling to tell me the news that Shiitake had died from being poisoned by castor beans. It was a short call but I was pretty sad. I guess this would have had to have been after Lyx had died cause I never had a cell phone when they were alive. I am going to stop there and write more tomorrow. This is probably the best sort of content that would make sense for me to write about. I have all these little fragments of memory hidden in my head here and there and the only way to make sense of them is to piece them out one at a time.